Feedback Thoughts
For this post I will be talking about feedback. Feedback is a very important thing when it comes to work whether it be positive feedback or negative feedback. It is important to always go to your lecturers for feedback so you know if your work is ok. If your lecturer gives you positive feedback for your work and tells you that everything is ok then you know that your work is ready to submit and that you have done well however if they give you negative feedback then they will tell you what changes need to be made to your work and you must make these changes in order to do well. In order to write this post I had to read two articles from a list of articles on the class website. The first one was "Seven Ways To Crush Self-Doubt". The first one was "Don't Compare Yourself To Others". When I was doing my college summer repeats a few weeks ago I found myself under a lot of stress and pressure to the point where I was having breakdowns and overthinking a lot about things and very full of self-doubt. I was doubting whether I'd get into second year or not and was just telling myself that I'm definitely not getting into 2nd year which led me to have a lot of negative thoughts about myself. I then started thinking about lots of people and how I felt like they were all doing better than me. I was telling myself things like "I'm nearly 22 most people my age are finished college, have full-time jobs, are able to drive, are in relationships, have lived away from home and I have none of these things. I failed my plc, did bad in my leaving cert, work part-time with my dad and I'm probably gonna have to repeat my first year of college". This was just making me feel far worse and making me lack the motivation to even try get into second year however after all this I passed my repeats. Comparing yourself to others is one of the worst things you can do as everybody does things differently and it will only make you feel bad about yourself and no matter how well you're doing in life or how bad you're doing there's always someone doing better or worse then you. As the post says if you compare yourself to other people you're seeing them as competition rather than a community and getting jealous of those who are doing better than you when realistically these are the people that can help you get to where they got especially if you're close with these people. One thing I enjoy doing is drawing. I do it as a hobby and I like to think that I'm good at it however I'm no professional. I have seen proper professional looking portraits on the internet and I know there are a million other people better than me at drawing however instead of telling myself "All these people are way better than me I'm not doing this anymore I'm no good at it" I keep at the drawings and tell myself "If I keep this up I might get that good one day". The second one was "abandon perfectionism". This is what I tend to do. Rather then aim for A's and B's I just aim for a pass and when I am drawing I don't aim for a professional looking portrait, I just aim to have a drawing that's good enough that you know what it is I'm meant to be drawing. The writer of the article tells us that he has met authors who have never published stories because they felt like their stories weren't perfect and they thought they needed to be perfect. The author also tells us that he has met teachers who are absolutely burned out from teaching and have never enjoyed it because they worked an insane amount of hours because they wanted to be perfect. The third one was "Be vulnerable to a trusted community". This means to let those around you know how you are doing and that they can encourage to keep aiming towards your goal. The fourth one was "Embrace A Growth Mindset". A growth mindset is the idea that talent isn't something people are born but something that can be earned through hard work. The fifth one was "Set Goals That Are Within Your Control". This means don't worry about things you can't control for example I want to get into filmmaking when I am finished college. I can't control whether people like my future work or not so there is no point in not trying to get into the film industry because I may not produce an Oscar-worthy film instead I should just focus on making films because it's something I want to do. The sixth one was "Treat Your Work Like An Experiment". This means that you have to try hard with your work even if you fail the first time. When trying an experiment it's always gonna fail on the first go so rather then do nothing you need to try again and you should look at work the same way. The seventh one was "Trust Yourself". This means to just do your work the way you feel is best for you and not the way you think is the correct, professional way. (https://spencerauthor.com/seven-ways-to-crush-self-doubt/).
The second article I read was titled "Why Rejection Hurts So Much - And What To Do About It". The article tells us that the reason rejection hurts so much is because our brains are wired this way. In the article they explain that scientists placed people in an MRI machine and asked them to recall a recent rejection. When doing this they discovered that the same part of the brain that activates when you are in physical pain activate when we experience rejection. It also explains that evolutionary psychologists believe that this started when we were hunter gatherers who lived in tribes. Back then humans could not survive alone so being kicked off your tribe was basically a death sentence. When people thought they were gonna get kicked off their tribe felt the pain of rejection and realised that they had to change their behaviour in order not to be kicked off their tribe and they then passed along their genes. Rejection also damages our mood and self-esteem and destabilize our need to belong. Unfortunately when people are rejected they become self-critical too so when their self-esteem is damaged they go and damage it more. The article also gives us three healthier steps to respond to rejection. The first one is "Have Zero Tolerance For Self-Criticism". This means that instead of putting yourself down after experiencing rejection you should think of ways to make sure it doesn't happen again and what you should do in the future. The second one is "Revive Your Self Worth". This means that you focus on what you have to offer instead of thinking about your flaws. It tells us to list five good things about ourselves and then pick one and write an article or two about this good quality. The third one was "Boost Feelings Of Connection". This tells us to remind ourselves that we are love and appreciated. It tells us that if your friends from work don't invite to a social gathering then instead of feeling unwanted invite your friends from your sports team to do something with you instead and if your child gets rejected by a friend then make plans for them to meet a different friend and if your first date doesn't return your calls then call your grandparents and remind yourself that your voice alone brings joy to others. (https://ideas.ted.com/why-rejection-hurts-so-much-and-what-to-do-about-it/)
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